The Adventures of Jessica Sideways

Today, when I went to the clinic to pick up my hormones, I saw a fellow sister. Another transsexual waiting (I think) to pick up her medicine. I was happy to meet another sister AROUND MY AGE but I was even more worried that I was able to pick her out so very well from the crowd of people that are normally at the clinic. Is it how we look, dress, speak or act? Somewhat, but I think the ability to be able to tell if another person is transsexual comes in a little think that has been called “t-dar”. Now, t-dar, or transsexual radar, is a radar that people possess to determine whether or not someone is transsexual or not. And furthermore, there is a wonder about who possesses the knowledge of how to utilize this special skill and who does not.

This is my first personal experience with t-dar: I was Houston in the Galleria area of Houston. Support group was in a couple of hours and Phil was willing to drive me back to Tomball from the support group. I saw an awesome-looking rock chic girl at the Galleria and I was floored with mental attraction but I could not understand why, it’s not like I had not seen other girls around there like her before. I finish up what I was doing over at the Galleria (playing with the other Macintosh computers) and head to support group. And lo and behold, there she was at support group with all my other good friends in the Houston TG Community! I thought “WOW! She passes so well, I must sit at her altar and figure out her secrets.”

I met and continue to meet girls like this all the time, either online or IRL and I just want to know what is it that makes them pass. And how to pass without experience or ability. I guess I get less and less floored by these people because I know the truth: passing is not an overnight thing. It happens over years and years of continuous practice and possibly even surgery. Either way, to pass is the transsexual’s common goal and well, passing takes a lot of time and many times, a lot of money as well. There is no secret to passing well, no hidden way that you can turn from a computer geek to Calpernia Addams overnight. No, this is done through years of experience and painstakingly expensive facial surgery.

But on this level, t-dar is about detecting what we already recognize in ourselves, the nervousness about passing, the tell tale masculine facial features, the voice and of course, other means to try to ascertain whether or not one is a sister. And of course, this is not fool proof. True and perfect t-dar is something that is developed over time with hanging around other transsexuals. I have to head to support group but remember that there is one thing and one thing only that you should remember: t-dar is so unnecessary! Well, unless you live in Denver where the support groups are so unbearable, very few people go.