The Adventures of Jessica Sideways

I hear all the time these bigoted assholes that want to “protect marriage”, when what they really want to do is divide people and forbid people from marrying who they love because of the sex of the people involved. Marriage should be between two adults who truly love one another and are committed to being with one another for life. Marriage is a meaningful institution and I hope that when I find the love of my life, I hope that I can get married to her and enjoy a long and fruitful relationship with her. I am seeking more out of life but I also want to settle down somewhere one day and have a family. Weird, I know, but I am telling the absolute 100% truth! I want to have the 2.5 children, white picket fence and the german shepherd. I want to have family vacations and be a stay at home mom once it is time for that. I know it sounds weird, but this is absolutely and honestly what I want out of my life - I shouldn’t be denied it just because my spouse will most definitely be another woman.

I wrote in an earlier post about the fact that McCain keeps lying and saying one thing when his intentions are clearly another and that because of this, Log Cabin Republicans need to think about American families and their rights and value them over party loyalty. Well, here is proof that McCain is truly as bigoted as many of the Republican presidents before him. He wants a ban on equal marriage and he makes this very clear through his support on the Arizona proposition 107, which would be a setback to equal marriage in Arizona. Need more proof? How about his decision to pick on Ellen Degeneres when he was invited on her show (this review of the clip is also very good)? Fortunately, Ellen cuts him down to size when he tries to say that marriage should be between a man and a woman. And Ellen, I share your hope that one day, it will be called marriage and not a contract as well.

But, getting back to the attack ad, the review video from theYoungTurks points out that John McCain is indeed on the ad, supporting it all the way. Also, the type of music that they play when they show the happily married gay couples and how it changes whenever they show the straight couples. They try to deny our humanity in the hearts and minds of people with this horribly discriminatory and distorted segue. Doesn’t anyone see that the shit that they are pulling here is to help instill the “values” of bigotry and hate into the hearts and minds of citizens. They try to say that by somehow allowing gay people the equal right to marry, the values of all the straight marriages will start to crumble. Some of these values are raising children, stronger families and stronger communities. Of course, none of these values will be removed from the institution of marriage when we get equal marriage rights, in fact, we will be using these exact values in our marriages. But I think I have had enough with picking on McCain (hey, I have a heart!) so let’s start picking on the homophobic messages.

The raising of children is a very valuable thing, I will say that. However, I can also say that there is no honest reason why being in a gay family would HARM any child at all. True, there may be some taunting and teasing, but this is only because our society is not strong enough to accept that two people can love each other, regardless of their sex. If you look at the children in a gay family, then you will see that they grow up to be stronger, more resilient people than normally because of the fact that they learn the values of diversity and equality earlier on. Straight couples could teach their children these values too and some do, but many straight couples are not teaching the valuable skills to the next generation of Americans. A number of parents are even harming their children by teaching them that bigotry against gay people is okay, which is doubly harmful when one of the children in those families is gay. This person has to overcome a lot of internalized homophobia and a lot of messages from their childhood to live a honest and accepting life. In fact, today, I met one person who was so afraid to do what she needed to do to go full-time, that she is stuck in her male mode out of fear of losing her family. Her family’s transphobia and bigotry is making her feel forced to stay in ‘boy mode’ and it deeply hurts her. So, by reinforcing heterosexism and opposing gay marriage, we can be sure that these fucked up values that, for whatever reason, it’s wrong to be gay, will continue to poison our society.

Gay marriages will help make our families stronger, bringing both partners and their children the same rights, privileges and responsibilities as all the members of a family have if the two people in the marriage are straight. For an example, if one of their children is sick but one of the lesbian partners in a lesbian marriage is the one that was inseminated for the child to be born, then the other partner would be able to go and make important medical decisions because of the fact that they are married and the child is also legally seen as hers, even though her spouse was the one that gave birth to the child. Or how about the power to see our ill and hurting lover in the hospital. I don’t know about you, but hospital visitation is a very fundamental right that we should have - but don’t because we can’t get married. So, by providing us and our relationships these fundamental rights and protections, we can have stronger relationships with our loved ones. We can support and be there for one another more easily and without so much red tape caused by the authorities. This will thus result in stronger families, so opposing gay marriage would be opposing stronger families.

Gay marriages will also bring about stronger communities, bound together even stronger by love and unity. When people see that being gay is not a bad thing, there will be less homophobia in our communities and any community that values and celebrates diversity is naturally stronger. When our children work and play among the children of straight couples and vice versa, we show them that being raised in a family that has two homosexual partners does not mess people up. In fact, when a family rises above all the bigotry and hate of others and shows that love can ultimately win through, the community begins to take notice and starts to become less divisive. We all know that when a community is divisive and starts to take on homophobic tendencies, they forget the real issues and focus on hate and teaching their children how to hate other people just because they are different. Forgive me if I do not share this value with you, but I feel that hate is not an emotion worth cultivating, for it has no long-term positive benefits. I choose, instead, to build better community through teaching people that love comes in all stripes and colours, that it’s not bland, black and white. So, we learn that since diverse communities are stronger communities, we learn that by supporting gay marriage, we support stronger, more diverse, communities.

There are also a number of additional reasons why to vote NO on Proposition 107, but it’s nature is just bigotry against gay people plain and simple. And, as a shout out to my dear readers in the State of Arizona, I beg of you - please vote NO on proposition 107. Thank you and good night!